― Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

That, speaks my heart out.

There is always a voice ringing in my head,"Hey, it's been awhile since I met up with xxx, maybe it's time for a catch-up..." and this, never happens. I can blame nobody because I am always (99%) of the time, the one who doesn't really transform my thoughts into actions.

Sometimes, it just drains me out, having to catch up with a friend or two. I would certainly prefer staying home alone, just laze my day away. Why? It feels better to have a golden silence than having the need to find topics for conversation with friends whom I've not been meeting up with. To me, it feels like a burden... Unless, the catching up consists of activities like some paddling actions, treks/hikes, just... Sports.

As we grow older, some friends stay, some friends go. Often, things come and go, that's the cycle. That's life. Probably, that's why people always say we should live in the moment because tomorrow is not promised.

I've had my fair share of losing some friends in one way or another, or rather, the friends whom I was once close with, weren't as close anymore. Everyone has their own lives to live, a path they have paved for themselves. Just as when one has started his new job, or enrolled into a new school, friends change or social circle expands. New friends, new colleagues, and inevitably, time that's gonna be spent with them would be longer...

Then, maintaining friendships with the old friends seem a little tougher. The meet-ups are now harder to accommodate to everyone's preferred timing, conversations get shorter, and etc... Ever since I'd gotten my Diploma, I could actually count the number of times I'd meet up with my batch mates from poly.

It's really just so pathetic.

No, it's not anybody's fault but really, everyone's tied up with their own schedule. Work, studies, exams, exchange, family, boyfriend, girlfriend... Again, it's a little challenging to arrange a date where everyone is actually free.

Yeah, I know.

Everyone's gonna say if you want something to happen, you always can make time for it which to me, I am totally putting both my hands up and nod my head aggressively to show that I am alongside with this statement.

I certainly believe that if you've the heart and determination to actually make things happen, you will do it no matter what.

Basically, when someone tells you that "I am not free" and also the overly used 3 words,"See how again" only can have 2 possible meanings,

1) They are REALLY not free.

2) They'd probably rather sleep than to meet you.

Most of the time, people take a rain check because they do not want to meet you. They would rather stalk you on all the social media platforms available to "catch-up" with your life rather than a genuine meet-up, and that is why, recently... I've been thinking, maybe I should get off from Facebook for a moment.

For me, I would go all-out if I really wanna have a meet-up, going across the border just to spend a couple of hours with people who are worthy of my time. But, sometimes, thoughts like,"Oh damn, I wonder if they actually wanna meet up with me or they feel like they are obliged to do so since I am crossing the border for them." would surface.

It's just... Tough.

To keep the fire burning in a friendship.

Certainly, once the fire is extinguished, it's gonna be a daunting task to reignite it.

So please, make time for people who are always there for you, literally or figuratively.

(Okay, I should be doing that as I preach too)

//

Remember

Keep those who care close to you.

//

Then again, how do one actually maintain a friendship?

Xx