Spamming posts like nobody's business.

Should I be relieved, sad, happy or what?
Practically, I have no idea what's going on and really don't know what is gonna be my next step. I think my life is so ruined. Alright, I am so dead and yes, you (all of you in general) can ask me not to think so much but whatever that is happening, is the factor why I have been thinking.

I think because I care about it.
I think because it matters to me.
I think because I've to clear my mind.

Whatever I think, I have yet to come to any conclusion. Therefore, it defeats the purpose for me to think so much but I can't help it. What's more can I do other than having myself to think and think and still thinking.

Yes, I hate holidays to the damn bloody max.
What's more for Christmas? It means totally nothing.
Although 2010 may be a good year, but who knows?

If I happen to die later on or any moment, I will fucking regret.
Hell yes, everything sucks for now.

Looking tough on the outside but it definitely opposes my inner-self. Whatever I can achieve, I will try my best but there is always flaw in whatever you do. No one is perfect, this jolly well speaks the fact that I do need help in any of my aspects.

I feel so hopeless, I can do nothing else and watch the days to pass by. Sorry if anyone who is seeing me with such a screwed up mood and face. When I don't feel good, I won't talk much and therefore, I would not entertain you as much as I could. I will be god damned-quiet and stop asking me what happened unless I am telling you on my own accord.

No one understands me like how I don't understand you. Again, it's you in general and not just one particular "you". We all live in our own world and I have no rights in your life neither you have yours in my life. You could lend me your helping hand but it's all give and take. If I do not take it then I am sorry about it.

It is way off different from love. You give and you give your best but do not expect anything in return. If you are ever expecting something in return, you love with demands not that's not true love.